Eowyn (the_whitelady) wrote,

A guest for dinner

Theoden: *drapes over Eowyn* hiii

Eowyn: Hi!

Theoden: I haven't been fed today. *big sad eyes at her*

Eowyn: Well, come on. I've got dinner ready.

Theoden: Yay!

Eowyn: Go get Melly and we can eat.

Theoden: *goes to retrieve her from her latest project* Is she supposed to have matches?

Melkor: You said you wouldn't tell!

Theoden: I didn't! You just did!

Melkor: How I loathe you humans

Eowyn: *holds out her hand* Matches, please.

Melkor: *puts a few matches into her hand* I was just trying to sacrifice to myself for power

Theoden: Nothing living

Eowyn: I hope not. Sit down, I have dinner ready.

Theoden: *eats happily* Noni's all mopey lately.

Eowyn: *cuts Melkor's meat for him* Why is that?

Theoden: I try not to inquire. I always find out she's done something horrible with elves again.

Melkor: *grabs the meat with his hand and gnaws* *gnawgnawgnaw*

Eowyn: MELLY. Use your fork. Theo, what do you mean, something horrible with elves?

Melkor: I will eat my meat like a man!

Theoden: Nothing I'm mentioning in front of your adopted offspring

Eowyn: You will eat your meat with a fork. *to Theo* Why is that so horrible?

Theoden: Because she's my *sister*. And I'm not sure I'm up to dealing with becoming an uncle or something

Theoden: I'm a bad enough influence as it is

Eowyn: Hmmm. You can't trust that she knows what she's doing?

Theoden: Of course not.

Melkor: You mortals *are* rather stupid.

Theoden: Thank you for your contribution, o dark lord whom I tremble before.

Melkor: *happy gnawing*

Eowyn: *shakes her head*

Theoden: See, the other reason I shouldn't be allowed near kids

Eowyn: Well, what's going on with Noni?

Theoden: I'm just guessing, I don't actually know. But since we haven't had a fight or really talked about anything besides Burgie, I'm assuming it has to do with her elf

Theoden: Or maybe she's totally fine and I can't remember what happy Noni is like.

Eowyn: She has an elf?

Theoden: Turgon.

Eowyn: Really. I should not be surprised.

Melkor: I hate his father *grabs for his milk*

Eowyn: You don't even know his father.

Melkor: Fingolfin. He hurt me.

Theoden: And stole your candy?

Melkor: Don't taunt me, human

Eowyn: *sighs* No bickering please.

Theoden: I'm not bickering! I'm just being a bully

Melkor: I will destroy him, you know. And the rest of his pitiful family

Theoden: But I thought we were friends. *mock sad face*

Melkor: The elf. *pauses* And you.

Eowyn: MELLY.

Melkor: *hunches down like a turtle*

Eowyn: No death threats to Theo.

Melkor: WHY

Theoden: I like this rule

Eowyn: It's unkind. What did I say about being unkind?

Melkor: I'm a dark lord! A DARK LORD

Theoden: I used to be just like this when I was little.

Melkor: ._.

Eowyn: *looks at Melkor*

Melkor: ...I want dessert

Eowyn: Are you going to be unkind?

Melkor: I will be very kind if it is cake

Eowyn: It's pie, actually.

Melkor: *considering look* What kind?

Eowyn: Chocolate cream.

Melkor: I will be kind.

Eowyn: *nods and serves dessert*

Theoden: I found out Wynnie was still going to Maglor's too

Eowyn: Oh, how did you find that out?

Theoden: She told me. And then showed me the knife Maglor made her.

Melkor: She was keeping a knife from me!?

Eowyn: Eat your pie. Why can't she see Maglor, Theo?

Theoden: It drives Noni insane.

Eowyn: Are you worried Maglor will hurt her?

Theoden: Well, the killing spree hasn't helped reassure me she wouldn't.

Melkor: She hurts me!

Eowyn: I know, and you're supposed to stay away from her, miss.

Melkor: You must help me smite that stupid bard!

Eowyn: To be fair to Maglor, she doesn't seem inclined to hurt Wynnie.

Theoden: Still, Eowyn.

Eowyn: *to Melkor* No smiting. *to Theo* Yes, I understand.

Theoden: Maglor did give me a bunch of money yesterday *nibbles on his piece of pie*

Eowyn: She did? Why?

Theoden: Accidentally made her feel guilty. It was really hard not to thank her for paying for my services

Eowyn: Not a good idea.

Theoden: I know. Sometimes I'm okay at not being inappropriate. Right?

Eowyn: Well, at least you held back.

Theoden: And got money out of it. Sexburg stole it right after though.

Eowyn: Why did she steal it?

Theoden: So it didn't look like a bribe. Also because she sucks

Eowyn: A bribe?

Theoden: I think she just wanted to take it

Eowyn: Why would she think it was a bribe, though?

Theoden: We were doing knight work. Sorry, forgot to mention that. It's amazingly ineffectual

Eowyn: Why did you have knight work with Maglor?

Theoden: I think she's the reason sugar's gotten more expensive.

Eowyn: Okay. *trying to follow this* So you were talking to her about that and she gave you a lot of money?

Theoden: I maaaay have mentioned the whole slicing me up thing

Eowyn: *shakes head* It does sound like it could be a bribe.

Theoden: I guess.

Theoden: You doubt my prowess as a prostitute to the elves? It could just have been payment

Eowyn: *facepalm* Oh Theo.

Theoden: *grins*

Eowyn: Why did you bring it up to Maglor, anyway, if you were on knight business?

Theoden: It was more of a 'I'm not going to press this because you're sort of insane'

Eowyn: If you think she's insane, that probably wasn't your best course of action.

Theoden: Meh meh meh

Eowyn: Okay, fine.

Melkor: Natural selection!

Theoden: Hush

Eowyn: *wryly* She may have a point.

Theoden: Do not listen to the tiny evil

Eowyn: Well, if you think she's dangerous, and you're worried about her hurting Wynnie, taunting her is not the best idea.

Theoden: It wasn't really a *taunt* so much as something that just popped out

Eowyn: *nods* Still. You're worried that she'll try to hurt you.

Theoden: A bit, yeah.

Melkor: should I get a doll so he can point at bits to fill me in on this conversation?

Eowyn: Don't you have dark arts and crafts to do?

Melkor: Bah! *climbs down his chair and scurries off*

Theoden: So do you have any idea where she comes from? Because that was uh...

Eowyn: Melly? I just found her in the streets.

Theoden: I am curious

Eowyn: I don't know, really.

Theoden: I think her owners have a lot to explain

Eowyn: Oh Theo.

Theoden: What? WHAT?

Eowyn: Owners?

Theoden: Parents. Whatever. Whoever she comes from

Eowyn: *nods* Yeah.

Theoden: Any clues?

Eowyn: Well. She really does think she's Melkor. Sometimes I wonder.

Theoden: It isn't like she's gotten confirmation from any area

Eowyn: *shrugs* I know that she's supposed to stay away from the elves. Because she threatens them.

Theoden: With kneebiting?

Eowyn: You know, smiting.

Theoden: Heh

Eowyn: She does seem to like taunting Maglor. Like you.

Theoden: I swear I'm not taunting

Eowyn: But Melly is.

Theoden: Oh, probably

Eowyn: Yes, I hope she outgrows it. Or settles down. Something.

Theoden: Is it that bad?

Eowyn: *sighs* She's a little obsessed.

Theoden: My little sister Swanhild had a period where she was convinced she was a horse. Maybe it'll pass

Eowyn: I hope so.

Theoden: Well, Swanhild never actually *did* grow out of it on account of dying and all, but I'm sure it won't come to that

Eowyn: Oh, well. Yes.

Theoden: I'm sure she'll be fine!

Eowyn: Well, she does have moments of not.... being evil.

Eowyn: .... although she's always offering to make me immortal.

Theoden: You could make it all the way back around to where you came from

Eowyn: I hadn't thought of that. *grins*

Theoden: Just take your place!

Eowyn: *laughs*

Theoden: Thank you for dinner. You are a lovely person

Eowyn: You're welcome. And you're always welcome here.

Theoden: Am I anything like the Theoden you remember?

Eowyn: Handsome. *grins*

Theoden: *preens!*

Eowyn: And stubborn.

Theoden: Hey!

Eowyn: *smiles* You asked.

Theoden: *sticks his tongue out*

Eowyn: I don't remember him being a brat...

Theoden: I'm so not a brat.

Eowyn: *just laughs at him*

Theoden: eeevil
Tags: dinner, melkor, theo
Comments for this post were disabled by the author